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Elf's Diary Entry #14 - Popularity is the slutty little cousin of prestige.

My room is very slutty at the moment.

I mean Slutty in the old fashioned sense.

There is crap everyewhere. Artistic crap, but crap none the less.

My warhammer elves are adventuring across the carpet, my Barbarella comic books are splayed openly by the fireplace, a cool lamp which I bought from Spittlefields market in the hope of being a hard-core DIY expert lays scattered heartbroken by my clothes horse. The lamp in question is an array of 33 different coloured pink plastic pieces which you slot together like a jigsaw puzzle - it's ridiculous to put together - attempting to last Sunday nearly pushed me to drink. All my jumpers have formed a Union together and have chosen to pile collectively and block my entrance to and from my bedroom. Even my cactus, Bob, looks sullen. The fact that everything in my room is Pink too (not Bob) makes it look like the inside of the brain of an Avril Lavigne fan on the verge of a breakdown.

In fairness, this is pretty much what I am at the moment.

Despite the fairylights, I think a mixture of bieng ill and being busy has brought the January blues on quicker. Also, dare I say it, I miss my siblings. My irritating, ginger, fiery siblings. Who knew spending 2 weeks constantly in their company over the christmas holidays would actually STRENGHTEN the family bond we have....

What can I tell you about YESTERDAY? Well, yesterday, to reallign my chakras I decided to do 'CORE' Bikram Yoga at Fierce Grace North. I can now get into most of the intermediate positions (only when I stand at the back and no one is looking at me) and my body is slowly turning into the 6ft elastic band I always wanted it to be. I was so nervous about Duck Flu I thoughht the 90 minutes in 40 degree heat would be a good way to calm me down and centre me.

Instead, I spent 10 minutess in an embarrassed state apologising after I accidentally slipped over during downward dog and whacked my forehead into the vagina of the woman bent over in front of me. Luckilly she was a pro and simply went into a forward-roll but I do think it affected her when we went into Pigeon pose.

It's the second night of DUCK FLU tonight. Already it is shaping up to be something entirelly different. We will see how it goes.

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